So here I stand on the metaphorical precipice of my future. I've been constantly straining to see what's coming once I take the leap of faith only to realise that to see I have to leap.
I sway back and forth between peace and anxiety of not knowing. Too much anxiety and I begin to step back, close down, let my situation smother me and cover me so I don't have to face what's ahead. Too much peace... well I don't think you can have enough peace. But even a little of it gives me courage to stand on the edge, and wait for the right time to jump.
The anxiety only comes from me. My thinking, and letting it tell me how to feel. Only I can create this anxiety and therefore only I can destroy it. I can have help from the outside, from encouragement and kind words of support. I certainly have help from God, in all his ways of ministering to me.
It is from Him that peace comes. My leap of faith is trusting that He is in control. I know that my God acts on my choices because in my relationship with Him not only do I try my hardest to trust Him, he unconditionally trusts me. This is part of that whole love thing.
So with that knowledge I stand on the edge and, with Him right beside me, will take that leap and like so many times before realise that living by His love only brings better things than I could have imagined. I tried to see before I leapt, but how could I see what I couldn't imagine? I limited my seeing with my own self-inflicted creation that is anxiety until I let go of the need to see and replaced it with trust in Him.
Amen.
